The Gym Mirror Obsession

THALASSA: Can we just do the reps?
MIKE: Look at this angle, Thalassa.
THALASSA: What angle? Your face?
MIKE: No, my triceps! They're popping.
THALASSA: You have one rep left.
MIKE: I need to document this peak.
THALASSA: With what? A mirror?
MIKE: The mirror doesn't lie.
THALASSA: It's telling you that you're vain.
MIKE: Vain is just another word for aware.
THALASSA: Aware that you're blocking the way.
MIKE: I am creating a focal point.
THALASSA: You are creating a traffic jam.
MIKE: Do I look like a pro?
THALASSA: You look like you're struggling.
MIKE: That's called 'the grind'.
THALASSA: The grind is supposed to happen in the set.
MIKE: This posing is part of the set.
THALASSA: It really isn't.
MIKE: My muscles need visual feedback.
THALASSA: Your eyes are your feedback.
MIKE: But the mirror adds depth.
THALASSA: The only depth here is my frustration.
MIKE: You're just jealous of my definition.
THALASSA: I am defined by my patience.
MIKE: Which is clearly running out.
THALASSA: Because you've been posing for ten minutes.
MIKE: It takes time to find the light.
THALASSA: We are under fluorescent tubes, Mike.
MIKE: Exactly! The lighting is industrial.
THALASSA: Industrial means ugly.
MIKE: No, it means raw and gritty.
THALASSA: Just lift the weight.
MIKE: I'm lifting my spirits by looking.
THALASSA: Lift the iron, not your ego.
MIKE: My ego is well-trained.
THALASSA: It's overdeveloped.
MIKE: Like my biceps!
THALASSA: Please stop flexing.
MIKE: Why? Does it intimidate you?
THALASSA: It bores me to tears.
MIKE: You have no appreciation for art.
THALASSA: I appreciate a finished workout.
MIKE: We are almost done.
THALASSA: We started this set in 2023.
MIKE: Time flies when you're shredded.
THALASSA: You're not shredded, you're just tanned.
MIKE: This is a natural glow!
THALASSA: It's a spray tan from Tuesday.
MIKE: Details are irrelevant.
THALASSA: The weight is irrelevant if it stays down.
MIKE: I'm just resting between poses.
THALASSA: Posing isn't exercise.
MIKE: It's isometric contraction!
THALASSA: You are stretching the definition of science.
MIKE: Science is always evolving.
THALASSA: So is my desire to leave.
MIKE: Just one more photo.
THALASSA: I am not taking your photo.
MIKE: Use a timer then.
THALASSA: I'm not helping you be narcissist.
MIKE: It's called self-love, Thalassa.
THALASSA: Self-love doesn't require a tripod.
MIKE: A tripod ensures stability.
THALASSA: Your ego is the only thing stable here.
MIKE: Look at this bicep vein!
THALASSA: I don't want to see your veins.
MIKE: It's a road map to success.
THALASSA: A road map to a mirror.
MIKE: You are so cynical.
THALASSA: I am an athlete.
MIKE: Athletes love their bodies.
THALASSA: I love my body when it's resting.
MIKE: Resting is for the weak.
THALASSA: I'm not weak, I'm tired of you.
MIKE: Just five more seconds.
THALASSA: You said that ten minutes ago.
MIKE: This time I mean it.
THALASSA: I don't believe you.
MIKE: Trust the process!
THALASSA: The process is a nightmare.
MIKE: A beautiful, muscular nightmare.
THALASSA: Just put the weight down.
MIKE: One last flex... and... done!
THALASSA: Finally! Let's go.
MIKE: Wait, I think I saw a blemish.
THALASSA: I am leaving you here.
MIKE: Don't leave me with my blemish!
THALASSA: Enjoy your reflection, Mike.
MIKE: Thalassa! Come back!
THALASSA: No!
MIKE: Just look at this angle one more time!
THALASSA: Never!
MIKE: Fine, I'll just take a selfie.
THALASSA: I can hear the camera clicking from here.
MIKE: It's for the fans!
THALASSA: You have three followers.
MIKE: And they are all very supportive!
THALASSA: One of them is your mom.
MIKE: She loves my gains!
THALASSA: I hate everything about this gym.
MIKE: See you tomorrow?
THALASSA: Unfortunately, yes.
MIKE: Great! We'll start with legs!
THALASSA: Oh no...