The Bad Hair Day

LISA: It's not that bad.
KATE: You look like a lawnmower hit you.
LISA: I just wanted a trim!
KATE: A trim is not a massacre.
LISA: The scissors slipped!
KATE: Slipped how far? To your forehead?
LISA: It was a very fast slip.
KATE: Why did you do this yourself?
LISA: YouTube said it was easy.
KATE: YouTube also says you can make gold from lead.
LISA: I thought I had the technique.
KATE: The technique of what? Randomness?
LISA: It looked a lot easier in the video.
KATE: The girl in the video was a professional.
LISA: She said 'anyone can do it'.
KATE: 'Anyone' excludes people with scissors and hope.
LISA: Can we fix it?
KATE: How? By cutting more?
LISA: Just one little snip.
KATE: One snip leads to a buzz cut.
LISA: I can't go out like this.
KATE: You could wear a headband.
LISA: A headband for what? Hiding a crime?
KATE: Exactly. A stylish cover-up.
LISA: My bangs are diagonal!
KATE: They are 'avant-garde'.
LISA: Avant-garde is for art, not foreheads.
KATE: Your forehead is now art.
LISA: Stop mocking my tragedy.
KATE: I'm not mocking, I'm observing.
LISA: Observe the horror!
KATE: It's not that bad if you squint.
LISA: I can't squint away a haircut.
KATE: Maybe a hat?
LISA: It's eighty degrees outside!
KATE: A very breathable hat.
LISA: No hats. Just fix it.
KATE: I am not touching those scissors.
LISA: Why not? You're my best friend.
KATE: Best friends don't make their friends bald.
LISA: I won't be bald!
KATE: You will if I try to 'even' it.
LISA: Just a tiny bit on the left.
KATE: The left is already too short.
LISA: Then do the right!
KATE: Now both are short.
LISA: At least they are even.
KATE: They aren't even, they're just both wrong.
LISA: I can see it now.
KATE: See what? The failure?
LISA: No, a little stray hair.
KATE: Don't you dare touch it.
LISA: Just one more snip...
KATE: NO!
LISA: Oops.
KATE: What do you mean 'oops'?
LISA: I might have gone too far.
KATE: You didn't go far, you went home.
LISA: Now they are really short.
KATE: Welcome to the buzz-cut club.
LISA: I hate that club!
KATE: It's very aerodynamic.
LISA: I don't need to be aerodynamic!
KATE: You'll save money on shampoo.
LISA: That is not a consolation prize.
KATE: Think of it as a fresh start.
LISA: A fresh start for my scalp.
KATE: It looks... sporty.
LISA: I am not sporty!
KATE: Now you look like a soccer player.
LISA: A soccer player with bad bangs.
KATE: Just use some gel.
LISA: Gel won't create hair, Kate.
KATE: It can spike them up!
LISA: Like a hedgehog?
KATE: Hedgehogs are cute.
LISA: I am not a cute hedgehog.
KATE: You're a very stressed hedgehog.
LISA: This is the worst day of my life.
KATE: You had a bad sandwich once.
LISA: This is worse than the sandwich!
KATE: The sandwich didn't involve scissors.
LISA: But it involved mayonnaise from 1992.
KATE: Fair point.
LISA: Can I wear a wig?
KATE: Where would you get a wig?
LISA: Buy one online!
KATE: Now we are back to the internet.
LISA: The internet can save my hair.
KATE: The internet caused this mess.
LISA: True. But it has solutions too.
KATE: Like a hat?
LISA: Stop suggesting hats!
KATE: I just like hats.
LISA: You like my misery.
KATE: It's very entertaining.
LISA: My life is not a sitcom.
KATE: With this hair, it definitely is.
LISA: Shut up and help me find the glue.
KATE: Glue? Why glue?
LISA: To stick the hairs back!
KATE: That's not how hair works.
LISA: I'm desperate, Kate!
KATE: Put the glue down.
LISA: Just a little bit...
KATE: NO!
LISA: Now my finger is stuck to my head.
KATE: Perfect. Now you're really art.
LISA: Help me!
KATE: I'm calling for backup.
LISA: Just get the nail polish remover!
KATE: On it, Hedgehog.
LISA: I hate you.
KATE: Love you too, Lisa.